ATTENTION SPAN DROPS
YEP, HUMAN ATTENTION SPAN NOW LESS THAN A GOLDFISH.
IT IS TRUE…. we promise, we found it on the interweb so it must be. There has been some research undertaken on the matter. It was at the request of a very large software business, you know that one Billy Boy started. So in the results it has been found that the human attention span is lower than the little fish you used to be able to win at the fairground (poor little fishies).
QUICK QUESTION. How do they measure the attention span of a Goldfish? Maybe for another blog post.
15 GREAT MARKETING YEARS.
Pay more attention.
As you may already have guessed. YEP, THE STUPID PARROTS have been marketing at their very lowest of low standards in their quest to drive humanity to a point of complete mental shutdown. WAKE UP… pay more attention. This is important folks.
NOT ALL BAD NEWS THOUGH. It is really bad news and the figures are there to back up the claims.
THE GOOD NEWS? Well everyone loves figures nowadays. The world is figure MAD. The best thing of all is that really cool infographic stuff can be generated. NOTHING quite like an infographic to lift some long winded research.
Sorry that is off track. WE ARE BACK. According to the research it has taken a mere 15 years for the global population to lose a dirty great chunk of their attention span to today’s marketing escapades.
The research shows.
ARE WE MISSING SOMETHING HERE? People have always been ignoring marketing. This is nothing new, but we would agree that it is getting worse. Why? you guessed it, STUPID PARROTS! You see this is the thing. We are not daft. We can spot this nonsense and simply choose to skip, go to another website, turn the page or block the offending stuff.
It gets better. To add to William’s research the generous people at Nielsen Research claim that it is not all bad news (quick, let’s make an infographic). They have some TOP TIPS. Shall we?
- Be clear in your messaging
- Keep your messaging short and sweet
- Appeal to consumer desires
NO… please STOP we cannot take any more. There are actually another 12 tips, 15 in total, but for us to list them here would be more minutes of our lives that we would not get back. So ff you want to see the full research findings – Google it.
72% TO 80% OF CONTENT IS NEVER READ.
Well if these figures are right you will not be reading this. Why? you ask in total anticipation. The answer… BECAUSE THE RESEARCH SAYS SO! It says that on average us humans only read 20% to 28% of any text (excluding books STUPID).
So here we all are writing loads of insightful stuff for our blogs and the lazy bastards won’t even read it. Charming! LET”S NOT FORGET why we write this stuff. It is 100% for the search engines. Oh and it keeps the copywriters busy too.
Based on this research marketing is quite difficult then? The STUPID PARROTS would agree because they have not got a clue (Scooby Doo) what it is all about. They get hold of marketing and in a few up and down movements of a mouse increase the intelligence of the world’s Goldfish population.
We hope you have learnt something from this post and take heart in the fact that Goldfish are making a come back with a longer attention span than us.
OH GREAT NOW WHAT DO WE DO?
Our advice may not be mainstream. It may not follow the trend. It may not even make sense at times. IT IS OK to be apprehensive at the start. We even join in with the STUPID PARROTS, but only because we are told to by the giants controlling audiencies (you know the type).
Our blog is good for almost everything marketing. If you have a spare few days take a look.

PLEASE IGNORE THE GOLDFISH. It has been left here for search engines as they like at least one picture to be on a page. Go figure!